OWENSBORO, KY — Robert de Bildur, Chairman of Owensboro’s Vacant Building Society thinks the number of buildings sitting empty in Owensboro is too darn high.
In today’s regularly scheduled deserted public session, Chairman Bildur said, “This town could use fewer fire pits and more pulpits.”
The society is recommending an influx of non-denominational churches, more banks with nine lines but only one teller, and a plethora of used cars lots which Bildur said should feature Ford Pintos, PT Cruisers, and Dodge Neons.
There’s no word on whether the city will act on the society’s recommendations.
Bildur closed the meeting by ceremonially asking the empty room, “can we fix it?” and a chorus of children’s voices in the distance could be heard chanting, “yes we can!”
One thought on “BREAKING: Owensboro’s Vacant Building Society Suggests Increase in Banks, Chruches, and Used Car Lots”
I think we are covered in the number of churches, car lots, and banks in this town. We need more things to do with children and as a family. Evansville gets a lot of business from Owensboro residents because there is not many options here in town. I’ve heard that they want Owensboro to be community and family oriented so why are we being driven to other cities to do things?